LEARNING ABOUT ME

My middle school years were horrible.

While trying to learn and understand myself as a unique, neurodivergent person (I have high-functioning autism), I also had the challenges of how to navigate the social world of middle school.

Classmates bullied me.

My childhood friend promised me that things would be okay, but then she pushed me away. She started siding with the other classmates.

I started self-harming and going nonverbal, which didn’t help my efforts to find friends. People thought I was rude for not speaking.

I tried masking– changing my behavior to cover up the parts of me that seemed too different from others. I wanted to fit in.

I kept trying to make friends but seemed to only find people who were not healthy or were struggling with their issues. They didn’t understand me and I didn’t know how to help them. This just set me up to fail, and I ended up being gaslighted, manipulated, and mistreated. Our relationships were toxic.

My relationship with my parents was very difficult at home. I don't think they knew how to help me.

Nobody seemed to know how to help me.

I became suicidal and had to be hospitalized.

During this time in the hospital and with ongoing therapy, I finally learned a lot about myself.

It helped– and continues to help me-- now that I am in high school.

I am finally learning how to love who I am– neurodivergent and awesome!

I have unique things about myself and I’m learning how to share who I am with others.

I no longer mask my behaviors. I’ve learned how to help others understand me– and how to be my friend.

I keep learning how to express myself instead of going nonverbal and keeping everything inside.

I am more open about who I am.

My middle school years were the worst but I’m glad I can look back and see how far I’ve come to learn about myself.

I know I can keep learning and I know can get through hard things.